Words you always hear from customers.
1. It can't be that. I just changed it.
2. It just started last week. My wife has been complaining about it for months!
3. My car ran better than this when I brought it in. (it was towed in)
4. I've got to have it by 5. Why can't you get the new engine installed in 4 hours?
5. EMERGENCY! My husband has a heart attack, you've got to give me first prority! (shows up Friday afternoon for a complete brake job - no appointment)

I am sure you have a few good ones too. Then you have the ones with their hands on their hips and they know you work on cars and they want FREE help. As you ask questions to try to help them out, they look at you like you are from Mars and say "why you asking that".

I also just LOVED it when you get some big blowhard who has come in that has changed EVERYTHING and has given up! Now he wants a professional to look at it and really gets pissed when he has to sign an estimate.

One of my BEST stories was this two bit mechanic friend of mine who couldnt get his Chevelle to accelerate properly. He was hot! Spent the WHOLE weekend working on it. Changing metering rods, adjusting float levels, ignition timing, fuel filters, fuel pumps. YOU name it. So as a good friend, I agree to go for a road test. He takes it out and stomps on it and it just boggs down. No black smoke out the back. So as we head on back, he is really SO sure it is something real difficult and starts to badmouth parts and on and on. So on a hunch, I asked him a question. I said "did you by any chance have a misfire you were chasing?" "Maybe Backfiring and you found maybe a cracked distributor cap or a bad plug or wire? He says yes. I looked at him and smiled cause I knew exactly what it was because I had experienced it before. I said c'mon, let me show you something. We pulled off the air cleaner cover and I showed him how the secondary upper air valve opens under hard acceleration (Rochester quadrajet carb). He says I know, I checked that and it was ok. So I poked my finger on the valve as he watched and he says "see? it's ok". Then I pointed out that the valve was opening but the metering rods are not lifting out of the secondary jets. He looks perplexed. He say's "oh man ". How'd that happen. I said See that plastic cam under that airhorn that is melted?" When you had your backfire, the flame melted that cam and THAT is why you have poor acceleration. You could see him just kind of stare. Then he says "that little plastic part can make a car do THAT? I just laughed, told him to fix it and stop bad mouthing people, mechanics and parts and start paying attention to details.

Those words are used a lot and it is kinda funny. Here is my "Andy Rooney" click on this (may he rest in Peace).

Old school is remembering your friends phone number. New school is relying on your cell phone for numbers and when things go wrong........you are screwed!
Old school is reading and understanding maintenance on your machinery and doing it!. New school is to do it any way you want and when things die, copy what some old guy does.
Old school is starting out with tools you can afford and as time goes on, buy premium tools. New school is shake hands with the Snap On guy and sign up for 25,000 in credit then piss and moan when the payments are a struggle.

Can you think of some?

Changed the oil on my neighbors Malibu yesterday. Went to a few local discount stores, could not find DEXOS oil. Went to Advance auto and even NAPA. They all looked at me like I was crazy, never heard of it. I'm not stupid, I know what is going on. All of these store chains have TONS of oil in stock and they want to get rid of what they have before they open their mouth (or stock) Dexos oil. Found it at Wallyworld. I also couldn't believe the price difference for these new cartridge oil filters they use on GM 4 cylinder engines. 5.99 at one place, 6.99 and 7.99 at others.

Neighbor was complaining his 1996 half ton truck with the 5.7 seems to be low on power. He added a cold air intake, new performance exhaust and still low on power. I asked him if he checked the plugs or knows when the truck last had a tune up. He said he looked at the plugs and they looked fine but would remove one so I could look at it. So he hands me this plug and right away I found the problem. Somebody had installed CR43TS plugs in this truck! They are the wrong reach and they should be platinum plugs, not regular plugs.

Sent him to the store to purchase a new set of platinum professionals (ac delco). Now the truck explodes to life when he starts it and the power came back.

So the lesson learned here for you guys changing your own plugs. Be SURE to put them side by side and look at them BEFORE you install them. If you see something that doesn't look right, go back to the parts store and verify OR log on to rockauto.com and look them up yourself.

I know you will love this tune from 1966. Play it LOUD!